[ That's all he sends because he's already getting down to business preparing two cups of coffee. Depending on how quickly Akechi arrives, they might even be done already—either way, he'll find Akira in the kitchen and in considerably better shape than he was in the last time Akechi arrived on a full moon.
Still, he's suffering another bout of discomfort, itchiness from another quick influx of fur coming in and pain from the shift and growth of bones in various parts of his body. It leaves him feeling on edge and snappish, although that feeling has been persistent over the last few days. The potion he drank has dulled the growling in the back of his head, anyway, and that's his main concern. The rest, he can deal with. ]
[While his own mood has been sour, he knows how to keep those things bottled up. His only concern really comes from the fact that he himself can act unpredictable around Akira. It should be fine. Besides, he does actually want to make sure Akira feels all right and wasn't lying about it.
He shows up to see Akira finishing up, so he smiles as he accepts the mug, looking at him for new differences in his body, though only casually—he won't scrutinize him too much.]
[ He doesn't look terribly different. Most obvious are the longer ears and that the visible fur is a bit thicker. Akira passes one of the cups over to Akechi and scoops up his own. ]
No problem. What was keeping you up?
[ As he speaks, Akira moves to casually lean back against the counter like he usually would, but he quickly aborts just as he does so, subtly stepping away from it. ]
[Odd. Though he doesn't know what that could really mean. Maybe part of his body is sore? Hm.]
Ah, it's nothing major or anything like that really. Just... restless, I suppose.
[The more time goes on, the more he wonders what he should be doing. Why he is alive now? What even is his purpose now? The full moons just wound up being a convenient marker of time.]
[He snorts without meaning to but he can't stop it. Who on Earth would bond with him and deal with that mess? Besides, he doesn't want to rely on someone like that.]
[ Stupid in the sense that Akechi is every bit as stubborn as he is—even though, deep down, underneath all of his reservations, Akira knows it's practical.
The response has any sort of humor fading from his expression. ] Typically the other person is the one who decides whether they enjoy something.
[ He's not going to comment on that last part right now. ]
[He raises his eyebrows, though he sips his coffee. Even Akira wouldn't spend time with him if he had other options but he doesn't point that out. The coffee provides a good way to keep his thoughts to himself.]
They need factual information to base their decisions on, though. [But he did notice Akira glossing over his own end.] Why don't you want to?
[ Maybe it's his moon-frayed nerves at work, but Akechi's response triggers a brief flash of irritation. His front teeth clack lightly against the rim of the mug as he brings it up to hide the twist of his mouth. Akira winces, the fumble cooling his mood just as quickly as it flared. He's still getting used to those being bigger, although it's mostly just brief forgetful moments now. ]
I have things I want to keep to myself. [ It might not be mind-reading, but if he bonds with someone, they'll at least be able to tell when he's hiding something. ]
[ Who needs a bond when he has ever-observant Akechi to pick up on his moods? Not Akira. ]
... It's fine. [ His expression softens a bit more now, and he tucks his arms across his front, resting his cup near the crook of his elbow. ] You're just not being fair to yourself when you talk like that.
We talked about second chances, right? Everyone on the planet can give you a second chance, but it isn't going to matter if you don't give yourself one.
Mmm. [He frowns. They did talk about that. But he still hasn't found a reason to be here or anywhere else for that matter. Looking at himself, he can't see how a second chance isn't wasted on him in the first place. Well, there are a number of reasons it wouldn't work out anyway.] There is quite a lot of literature written about this subject, you know. For example, Aristotle posited that nothing is inherently good. No action has inherent goodness but rather a number of factors about yourself plays into what makes the action good or bad, not the outcome of said action.
[ Chances are he's not in the right mental state for a philosophical discussion tonight, but Akira buckles in anyway. If this is how Akechi views the world, he'd like to try. ]
So do you think you're incapable of doing good things because of those factors? [ He's caught a couple of glimpses now of Akechi's true self-worth; it wouldn't be surprising if that were the case. ] Because if so, I disagree.
Not because of the factors he outlined specifically. [But that murmured correction doesn't explain his own feelings very well.] What do you think then? I'm curious. I don't know too much about your views on these matters.
[ A finger taps at the handle of his cup as he considers how to piece together his thoughts. ]
... I think it's true that it's not so black and white. But I don't think any number of bad factors means someone is less capable of doing good. We're all capable of it, even without a change of heart to wipe those things away.
I don't know if everyone is capable of good. [Most people he has met throughout his life wouldn't qualify for that.] But I actually do agree that bad factors don't exclude the ability to do good or cancel out anything good they do. It really depends on the situation. Still, it's something important to humans, which is why so many philosophers have tried to come up with a system that can create a good person, or at least their version of a good person. Morals and ethics play into that, of course, but even so, everyone tries to figure out what would be the 'right' thing to do at some point.
It seems too complicated to ever be defined by a system. Systems require a certain amount of logic, and people and emotions just aren't logical sometimes. [ Like Akechi mentioned earlier, basing enjoyment on factual evidence—sometimes it doesn't even play out like one would expect looking at facts.
He reaches back to set his cup onto the counter. ]
But I guess that's what makes it exciting for philosophers to pursue.
[He gives an encouraging nod as he lowers his cup from his lips, smiling.] That would be similar to absurdist theory. The universe is chaotic and meaningless and yet we search for meaning, for purpose, for absolutes that cannot ever be given. Probably, anyway. It's a perfectly valid philosophy to subscribe to.
"Thus I draw from the absurd three consequences, which are my revolt, my freedom, and my passion. By the mere activity of consciousness I transform into a rule of life what was an invitation to death, and I refuse suicide." [He laughs softly.] That would be Camus, a rather famous absurdist. To exist is an act of rebellion in a universe that denies you significance and meaning.
I think I can relate to that one more than the others. [ Maybe because he's had to fight his way into creating a place for himself in the world. Rebellion has become so tied to his existence that it seems apt. ]
I thought you might like it. I think it suits you. [He hesitates before making a decision and continuing.] Hegelian philosophy is characterized by the dichotomy of master and slave, of you and the other. I'm oversimplifying it, of course. The problem with Hegelian philosophy is that you could read several different volumes and still not have made much of a dent.
[Akechi drums his fingers on his mug.] But in essence, there is you and the other. By seeing the other, you come to recognise yourself. Your strengths but also your weaknesses. Your flaws. And in the other, you see the strengths and weaknesses. It creates an instability in your world that you, naturally, try to correct. You try to come out on top and dominate the other. However, that way leads to ruin, because it isn't domination anyone really wants. It's recognition. It's equality. No one who solely dominates finds it fulfilling or rewarding. They must continue to do it, again and again, and it will never be enough. It will never give them what they need for their true satisfaction.
[How many rich people are content with their riches? How many politicians are content with their power? No one who builds their lives on domination has been satisfied with that life, as far as he has seen. They only devour more around them.]
Basically, we live in a world of interactions and we desire something from those interactions. We have a self that needs to be met by the selves of others. I find it interesting.
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I'll be over in a minute. Let me get dressed.
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[ That's all he sends because he's already getting down to business preparing two cups of coffee. Depending on how quickly Akechi arrives, they might even be done already—either way, he'll find Akira in the kitchen and in considerably better shape than he was in the last time Akechi arrived on a full moon.
Still, he's suffering another bout of discomfort, itchiness from another quick influx of fur coming in and pain from the shift and growth of bones in various parts of his body. It leaves him feeling on edge and snappish, although that feeling has been persistent over the last few days. The potion he drank has dulled the growling in the back of his head, anyway, and that's his main concern. The rest, he can deal with. ]
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He shows up to see Akira finishing up, so he smiles as he accepts the mug, looking at him for new differences in his body, though only casually—he won't scrutinize him too much.]
Thank you for the invitation and the coffee.
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No problem. What was keeping you up?
[ As he speaks, Akira moves to casually lean back against the counter like he usually would, but he quickly aborts just as he does so, subtly stepping away from it. ]
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Ah, it's nothing major or anything like that really. Just... restless, I suppose.
[The more time goes on, the more he wonders what he should be doing. Why he is alive now? What even is his purpose now? The full moons just wound up being a convenient marker of time.]
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[ Or so he's been told a few times. Akira just can't get behind the idea of sharing all of his emotions with another person yet. ]
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What a terrible idea.
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Hey, I don't make the rules this place runs on.
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No one would enjoy that arrangement: myself or the unfortunate on the other end. Besides, that advice would work for you, too.
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The response has any sort of humor fading from his expression. ] Typically the other person is the one who decides whether they enjoy something.
[ He's not going to comment on that last part right now. ]
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They need factual information to base their decisions on, though. [But he did notice Akira glossing over his own end.] Why don't you want to?
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I have things I want to keep to myself. [ It might not be mind-reading, but if he bonds with someone, they'll at least be able to tell when he's hiding something. ]
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Like when I irritate you. My apologies. That isn't a very good 'thank you'.
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... It's fine. [ His expression softens a bit more now, and he tucks his arms across his front, resting his cup near the crook of his elbow. ] You're just not being fair to yourself when you talk like that.
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Ah? That's the part that irritated you?
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We talked about second chances, right? Everyone on the planet can give you a second chance, but it isn't going to matter if you don't give yourself one.
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So do you think you're incapable of doing good things because of those factors? [ He's caught a couple of glimpses now of Akechi's true self-worth; it wouldn't be surprising if that were the case. ] Because if so, I disagree.
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... I think it's true that it's not so black and white. But I don't think any number of bad factors means someone is less capable of doing good. We're all capable of it, even without a change of heart to wipe those things away.
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He reaches back to set his cup onto the counter. ]
But I guess that's what makes it exciting for philosophers to pursue.
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"Thus I draw from the absurd three consequences, which are my revolt, my freedom, and my passion. By the mere activity of consciousness I transform into a rule of life what was an invitation to death, and I refuse suicide." [He laughs softly.] That would be Camus, a rather famous absurdist. To exist is an act of rebellion in a universe that denies you significance and meaning.
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I think I can relate to that one more than the others. [ Maybe because he's had to fight his way into creating a place for himself in the world. Rebellion has become so tied to his existence that it seems apt. ]
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[Akechi drums his fingers on his mug.] But in essence, there is you and the other. By seeing the other, you come to recognise yourself. Your strengths but also your weaknesses. Your flaws. And in the other, you see the strengths and weaknesses. It creates an instability in your world that you, naturally, try to correct. You try to come out on top and dominate the other. However, that way leads to ruin, because it isn't domination anyone really wants. It's recognition. It's equality. No one who solely dominates finds it fulfilling or rewarding. They must continue to do it, again and again, and it will never be enough. It will never give them what they need for their true satisfaction.
[How many rich people are content with their riches? How many politicians are content with their power? No one who builds their lives on domination has been satisfied with that life, as far as he has seen. They only devour more around them.]
Basically, we live in a world of interactions and we desire something from those interactions. We have a self that needs to be met by the selves of others. I find it interesting.
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